Sunday, March 30, 2008

Busy Weekend!

We had such a busy weekend! I know weekends are for resting but resting we did not! Yesterday, Ruby got her first class, baby and me swim lessons. Oh it was so fun! I took this class with Ava and was very social. I was so lonely I really tried to make friends. This time it was so different. There were so many cute babies and nice parents but this time, I had no interest in them, just Ruby! Ruby and I rarely get time alone in the normal waking hours. She and I had so much fun together. She did so well and I was gushing with happiness from having her all to myself. I felt like the class was on one end and Ruby and I were dancing along on the other end. This time, I just did more of our own thing. I find actual lessons at this age silly. I think its more about the experience and exposure then actually thinking they are going to learn to swim.
Then, we came home. I put her down for her nap, rushed into the shower and met Ava (she was at her music class) at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion for Swan Lake. That was fun and beautiful. Ava was so into it. She kept telling me that one day she is going to dance like that because she will practice a lot. She was so calm and sat their wide eyed at the beautiful dancing and costumes. The piece was so long, we did leave early. I for one didn't need her to watch the double suicide and the other is, around the middle of the second act she was getting squirmy and bored. I kept asking her if she wanted to leave and she did not but when she started belting out Creep from Radiohead, I knew we had to go. The ballet was beautiful but there were some ugly viewers. We were stuck near two crazy ladies that paid their money to look around and shush people instead of watch ballet. That, I could deal with out!
Next, I raced home put on my yoga pants and went pole dancing! That was a super fun, hard workout! We learned two pole tricks, how to crawl, walk and move around in ultra sexy ways and a routine. I will be posting this up very soon, yeah right! :) I really liked this workout!
Now today, Sunday, I am sore!! I think I am going to sign up. I really liked it and it was fun! So we raced to the grandparents to get the girls, then off to a birthday party at the park that was amazing! petting zoo, magic show, balloon artist, huge pizzas and cupcakes at a gorgeous park. cheers to carmen and jj!!
Then we came home tried to clean up and do yard work.......then off to the garden school GM. Jesus this was a busy weekend and I know we are going to pay for it during the week but it was fun!! I got alone time with Ruby, then Ava, then myself! Amen!!! I've been sad, grumpy, stressed, and frustrated for too long now and now I feel really good. Oh and we did our taxes and got a nice return, yay!!!!!!! Happy Monday!

Monday, March 24, 2008

I love this ad


This picture cracks me up. I never buy genetically altered fruit because the whole idea creeps me out. Sometimes, I'l see it at my parents or on the news (japan made square watermelons to fit easier in their fridge). I remember my dad had little Ava crazy for peaches that were shaped like saturn. Really.......whats the point in that? I almost got sucked up into one the other day. I was at vons and they had quarter half watermelons for sale but they were about the size of a large grapefruit. I could already see Ava sitting on our front step, looking around with her watermelon and spoon. As I went to pick one up, I thought.......wait! That was made just to make things easier for me. I'm all for making things easier but not at the risk of my daughter. I thought......oh but that would be so easy then my next thought was.......just take the time and cut a large one small like that. duh........

Kindergarten Madness!!!!

I'm so unsettled and crazy over as to what school Ava is going to attend this Fall. We don't feel our local school is the best choice for Ava. We don't like the looks of it, the uniforms or the lack of diversity. The scores are pretty good, we haven't met the teachers or the principal but we don't like it. So we have applied for charter schools like every other involved parent in LA has done. We've been wait listed on two. Los Feliz, we got the terrible number of 199. :(..... and Avison, we got 81. Both bad but we are only heart broken over Los Feliz. Avison was a plan C. Better than our local but not A or B. Los Feliz would have been A. But we were REJECTED!!!
The way you get into these schools is, you preview them, you fill out an application and on a selected day they pull names for a random lottery. Ava's first choice is Odyssey. Why because all her friends from her preschool go there. She will have friends up until the second grade. The school is in Altadena, where Breyne works, thats a plus, Ava wants to go there, another plus a few people we really like go there, another plus. The teachers and Director seem great. The minuses, the director is leaving. They are hiring a new one, that could be good or bad. The campus itself isn't to eye pleasing but they are working on it and we wouldn't have minded breaking out and meeting new families at a new school. This grade school business has me a wreck!! I wish we could afford the French school or Waverly but we can't! It feels so weird that Ava won't be with me every day and the state will require my own child to be away from me. Weird, the law will require her to be away from me five days a week! I'm sure I will get used to it but I don't fancy being told what to do. Damn the man!!
I was supposed to hear from Odyssey today but there computers went down. I hate that I have to wait one more day!! I'll hear from the language school in late May and the same for Daliah Heights and Eagle Rock. Damn! I hate this feeling of desperation!!
I'm a failure at kindergarten patients!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Thanks Man



Everyone needs a friend that can say......shut the fuck up, your fine and turn that shit off! Thanks Jen for sugar coating your words. :) I feel so much better! xoxo

Monday, March 17, 2008

Uncle Seb




Our Uncle Eusebio passed away last week. He lost his battle to pancreatic cancer. He gave it a good fight and did a few rounds of chemo and had surgery. He refused to give up and refused to accept this would be the end for him. Our Uncle was our Dad's older brother. He was in great health up until last summer. He was a sweet kind man. Growing up, we saw him and our Aunt every Sunday at mass. We would see our older cousins running track on our walk home from grade school. They lived a few miles from us. My Dad's been sick a long time and my Uncle helped us take care of him. I remember when I first had Ava, we would go and sit with my Dad and my uncle would show up to take my Dad to a movie. This last December when my Dad had his stroke, I called my Uncle to tell him. He told me he was having chemo so I tried to get off the phone, he told me wait I need to know everything and as I told him, he weeped. It was hard to hear my uncle so upset. It broke my heart to think of him sitting through chemo crying over my dad and my dad fighting for his life down the hall. My Dad's always been the sick one and I don't think any of us expected my Uncle to pass first. After chemo, he would still come over and sit in the living room with my dad. Unfortunately, both he and my dad were very sick this past hospital stay for my dad. My Uncle wasn't able to leave his home but he called my Dad every day. This time, my Dad got to go to his home and visit him. From what I was told, they had a beautiful talk about life, death and spirituality. My Uncle died hours after he and my dad said good bye. Sadly, my dad was hospitalized again and he had to miss his brothers funeral. The services were nice but now the reality is here we are all trying to deal with. How do we go on? My Uncles wife and youngest granddaughter, are really suffering. My Dad is really torn up and I can't imagine this world without our uncle. He was a real blessing. My friend sent me this and it helps and my hope is that death is not the end.

"Little knew that morning that God was going to call your name.
In life we loved you dearly, in death we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you, you did not go alone;
for part of us went with you the day God called you home.
You left us peaceful memories, your love is still our guide,
and though we cannot see you, you are always by our side.
Our family chain is broken and nothing seems the same,
but as God calls us one by one, the chain will link again."

I love this picture of my uncle waving goodbye, or maybe hello?
This is my Dad's entire family. He's the little serious guy in the middle. His Mom Maria gave birth to all these boys. It said they were all over 12 pounds. She had them all at home. She died when my dad was four. The other picture is their Dad, my Uncle and again the little guy is my dad. He's sooooo cute! I see a lot of Ruby in him. Seeing these pictures of my Dad and his family means a lot to me. My Dad has shared very little of his childhood. My Dad and his brothers are very simple people with little words but have the kindest biggest hearts!

Day One of Spring Break


We went to tea house and got pedicures after. It was fun. Ava's got a good life.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Black on the inside.

Queen Marabelle Mariposa Ava Maria Miller


Ava doesn't really like her name, so she changed it. Here's the new one, I hope you like it!

Sunday, March 9, 2008

Happy Four and A Half Ava!


Ava turned four and half on March 6th. She had a great day! Her Friends at school even sang a surprise half birthday song to her. I mentioned to her teacher that morning that Ava was so excited because it was her half birthday. So her teacher had them sing to her. Isn't that sweet! She had a fun day at school, then we went to Shanes Inspiration, then off to gymnastics, then home! We made her favorite things for dinner. Salmon, cous cous, salad with croutons followed by a very moist strawberry cake with four and half candles on it.

Ava is a nice person. She's very focused and determined, she very imaginative and talkative. Ava's highly sensitive. She's fun and really appreciates music. Ava is also a very nice older sister and friend.
Here is an example of Ava, she was telling me today about who her friends are going to marry and was speaking of how she's going to marry isaac and if not isaac it will be indigo but her hopes are on isaac. she said all that word for word then says......."so hows your marriage going?". lol this girl cracks me up! Last week, her daddy taught her the word homie so she kept referring to her "best homie carmela" or i can't wait to see" my homie lulu". haha!
Ava has a sweet life, I hope it keeps getting better!!!

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

I forgot to add my favorite photo


So we were leaving the park when Cruella came up to us saying "Oh Alice" (Ava dressed like Alice) She sounded very posh pronouncing her "a's" like "ah's" and pulling her words slowly like she had a few cocktails. She said "Where do you have that white rabbit, I need a new hand bag" lol! She was by far my most favorite character I'd seen at disneyland. Usually they just nod their heads or look at you blankly and smile. Ava was very amused because she's been watching this movie with her grandma marie. Cruella then said "do you have any puppies at home? I'm needing a new coat." Ava said no I only have old dogs and she said......"well I like young fur so buzz off." we were all cracking up. Then she told Ava to open your dress and looked wicked like me for the pick-cha. We loved Cruella!

Wishing Eddie The Best...






Yesterday, Ava and I went to Disneyland with Eddie. Originally we were going to take Ruby but I realized that would be really hard on her and we could have more quality time with the Uncle otherwise. We had a great time, we took Ava on rides, ate junk food and in the end, my brother bought both my girls presents to remember this day. Ava got an Alice In Wonderland snow globe and Ruby got a plush baby dumbo. It was really the cutest gifts ever. I think I am going to hug that Dumbo tight when I am missing my brother.
As you can read, parting with him isn't easy for me and I don't have the courage to write a full blog about it so I am keeping it short. My brother is awesome and he's going to be so missed but he deserves what he is going to get in Texas. If it wasn't so hard for me to say good bye, I would tell him, Im going to miss every once of you and its going to be hard to recover but I know that your life is going to grow and your dreams are going to come true. I love you and be safe. In real life I will probably smile and fight me tears and say see you soon. Maybe I will tell him about my blog.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Barbie Vs. Brats


Ava's really into playing hair salon these days. She blew me away the other day, I was running around cleaning doing my usual play for a minute, put stuff away, grab a snack, talk to Ava business. I walked out of what we call our "cabin" and walked back in and Ava put piggy tales in her hair! it was so cute! Two low pigtails. Shes always asking for rubber bands and clips and does the cutest stuff with her hair. I had no idea I would be passing up the hair brush so young in her life.
So let me back track. A while back a lot of the older girls that graduated from Ava's preschool were in that Bratz movie. Yes, the hippie granola preschool that's anti media, yet most of their parents make their living in media. Ahem.....so these girls that Ava idolizes were telling her that they were in this movie. So Ava wanted to see it. I had to tell her no and let her know that we don't play with Bratz dolls either. Ava being Ava did not like hearing there was a toy that she couldn't play with and I can't blame her. I understand that. So I had to get creative and explain to her what the word Brat means and how these dolls are made to look like stripper whores without having to tell her those words exactly.
Ok, so we were at Target and Im such a sucker and I always want to buy her things and I remember how they have those doll heads to style their hair. So we ran over to the doll area and the barbie head happen to be the Mariposa edition. I was so excited because Ava has the book and its in spanish (exciting for a mexican girl to see a barbie doing some spanish) and I said here and Ava said "Ugh (with that questioning Ava face) do you really want me playing with a doll that looks like this? So for a moment, she was the adult and I was the little girl. I said what, you don't want this and she grabbed it and said I do! So I looked around didn't see any other head options other than the bratz version thats an entire torso and if you could imagine, way worse, I noticed, she does look like a stripper whore too! But at this point, I wasn't going to take it away from her.
So this played over and over in my head. Ava needing to remind me I was the one who said she couldn't play with dolls that looked like grown women. It bothered me so much I took a trip to walk down stripper bratz aisle and do see that barbie isn't nearly as trashy but she's still pretty inappropriate for a four year old to be playing with. Some are worse than others but just because she's blonde and white........she can still whore it up! Have you seen the Top Model barbies? Slutty for sure but they do look kind of fun to play with if you are a grown perverted man! :)