Katie Holmes wishes she had this much style.

My girls have natural style and they look fully alert. ;) These glasses are a smaller version of Mommy's bought at Wee Soles on Sunset. Ava loves them!

Dinner Time

This is my favorite time of the day. Over the last few months I have actually been able to cook meals again for my family. I am no longer heating up Trader Joe's prepared food like we did for months once Ruby came. I'm actually cooking!!! Ava's favorite dish is salmon. I love hearing her say, "please can we have salmon". This is the one time of day(during the week) we can all sit down and eat together. The other night, I was looking at my girls and thought wow, what gorgeous company I have. Ava's wearing a bow from earlier in the day that just so happens to match her night gown and Ruby......she's always making a silly face. This girls on personality!!

Let me explain........

So a few days ago, I posted the lyrics to Bright Eyes, "Make A Plan to Love Me". I'm sure most of you read that and wondered what the hell that was all about. Well friends, that was a mixture of emotions that was brought on by the death of Brad Renfro. I was really upset the day he died. I felt sorry for that sweet little boy we all fell in love with in the 90's. I was very taken by his death, I felt like a lost a friend. I didn't want to post those feelings because it seemed so off the wall. It seemed like Gracie's gone crazy, she thinks Brad Renfro was her friend and she buys doll magazines! ;)
Make a Plan to Love Me, that song kills me. Every time I hear it, I feel it deep inside of me and sometimes I want to cry as I sing it. When I am in this place, I find myself in the background thinking.....why am I so sad? I have a great husband and two great daughters but it pulls me back into a time where it was hard for me to accept love. It reminded me of a time where I felt like I had nothing going for myself and I was invisible. It was a very sad time for me. It reminds me of times when I gave out love and wasn't given love in return. That song pulls to a place far behind me.
I wondered if Brad was really messed up, if he felt terribly lonely or did he just really love being high? I'm sure it was a mixture of all those things. After that night, I was ok and didn't feel so hurt by his death. Yes its very sad but hello....he wasn't a friend I lost. (I was a bit crazy about it) And now Heath Ledger has passed. This is yet another tragedy. He was so talented and young and a father. Sometimes it seems like money is the key to everything and you look at these poor souls that have left so early and feel really thankful for the life you have. I'm sorry they died to young. Maybe in some way their passing will make a positive difference to our world. I hope so and my they have peace.

This is Blythe

Move Over Barbie

So you all know, I love dolls! And having girls has really pushed me back into that world. When I was younger, I wasn't that into Barbie. She lacked a certain luster for me. I found her a bit boring. I did however like a few of the barbie knock offs that had scented hair and my did Iooooove barbies shoes and hat boxes!! A few years ago before kids, I discovered this doll called Blythe (doll in paris picture) Im sure you've all seen her post card book or fashion books. They were sold at indie book stores, art stores and urban outfitters. I searched and tried to get one but they were selling for thousands of dollars. During my search I found a Blythe ispired doll called Pullip (the kimono dolls) I also discovered the huge following these dolls have. They have several clothing designers and loads of websites and they really increase in value. I ordered a few, a few years ago and they have tripled in value. The other day I bought a magazine called Haute Doll (creepy I know but their was a Pullip on the cover) and I flipped through it and found this crazy gorgeous doll called Zombuki (the face painted pullips) They are the body of the Pullip and an artist made some of them zombies (the glazed over eyes that i could personally do without) and painted their hair and faces wild colors. I looooove these dolls! I searched every where for them and couldn't find them anywhere but of course on Etsy. Of course crafters and artist would find ways to bring these gorgeous dolls to the Etsy empire. However, the dolls cannot be purchase yet. They are only auctioned off at the moment!! Auctioned! They must go for so much money! Etsy however, has stickers and pictures of them. I went to the designers website www.zombuki.com and sent her an email. Lucky me, I'm on the list to own one when they are released to us simple folk. Yay!!!! By the way Blythe fans, by popular demand, they have made more Blythe dolls to be released in 2008!! Oh and FYI that doll magazine, aside from the pullip/zombuki section, it was just as freak show creepy as you would imagine.

Happy Anniversary!!

Today is one year ago that we moved into our house! It was a really fast, really good year. Today Ruby turned 11 months. I can't believe she'll be a year in thirty days... :(

Music is My Hot Hot Ava!

So Ava's a rock star, she's a really cool 4 year old. She asks me to down load her music and told our babysitter "don't worry my mommy has an ipod". She loves CSS and I've tried to find a censored version but they just don't have one. Her favorite song (as she calls it) is, "Music is my boyfriend". She loves music and loves boys so that title, makes her grin every time. She likes White Stripes because of Meg, they are "both girl drummers". Her favorite song from Cornelius is Drop because of the water. She also loves Damien Rice. She often asks, mommy can we play the "I don't know song" She is seriously into music. She loves to clap her hands to Amy Winehouse or will tell her Daddy...can we play some loud punk rock. The girl is super cool!
Routinely, Ava picks up an instrument and sings a song to us. Today this is how it went....

Daisy Rock guitar in hand...

"Oops! My penis is broken! Now I look like a girl!"

She was strumming her guitar smelly cat style!

*Parenthood, its so much fun!

Bright Eyes

"Make A Plan To Love Me"

I heard you're scheming new pyramids
Another big idea to get you rich
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

You said you had your foot in the door
You buy and you sell, you buy some more
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

Life is too short
Death doesn't ask
It don't owe you that

Some things you lose
You don't get back
So just know what you have

And make a plan to love me sometime soon

First you want to ride off into the Sun
Then you want to shoot straight to the Moon
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

When you are young the world is a Ferris Wheel
I know we will grow old it is lovely, still
Make a plan to love me sometime soon

Life is too short
To be a fool
I don't owe you that

Do what you feel
Whatever is cool
But I just have to ask

Will you make a plan to love me?
Will you make a plan to love me?
Will you make a plan to love me sometime soon?

hello cookie face

Ruby.......she is the most mellow and the most playful child. About a week ago, she decided that she is done with vile baby food. She wants to eat our food. When ever I eat, she crawls all over me until she gets some. Today we sat on Diane's kitchen floor (Diane was cooking dinner) and I fed her a clementine. I couldn't peel the orange fast enough. She was on me and grunting! Ruby is the most happy feeding herself. She grunts and kicks her feet while she eats. She looks around the room and gives out big grins. She loves being just like us. I feel her, I remember it sucked being the little one, most of the time. Here is Ruby with a cracker up her nose and on her eyelashes!!!

Score!

I've been mopping around over these rose gold shoes and purse that I can't have because I am trying to be more disciplined. I've tried them on, walked by them, then back again. I've looked at them on the website, over and over again. I've even re read my resolution and convinced myself no where on there did I state I will not shop in 2008 but, further down I read "I will be harder on myself in the places I am weak" and because of that statement, I don't spend. My friend told me to stay away from my computer, she's right but thats impossible. So today, I was cleaning up and found three target gift cards stashed in a drawer!! SCORE!! I forgot I had these, my mom gave me one for christmas, I bought one in the summer and lost it and had to buy another gift, then found it. And I had another one my mom randomly gave me in September. I know you are all wondering......why haven't you spent them?? Because I am a retard and everytime I go to target on a whim I never have them with me. Well today ladies, its paid off! I'm getting that purse and shoes..........yay!!! I'm so happy I feel like I should give a speech!!

Migrain!!

I've got a meeting today with Candace about my up coming projects and I have a migrain! What kind of timing is this? I had a great night with Breyne last night and woke in the middle of the night with this headache. Nothing seems to be helping me. I almost canceled but I just can't. I have got to finish up this stuff to meet my goals this year. I hope great things come out of this......cross your fingers for me!

Size 8 please

Not spending money on needless beautiful things really sucks. I opened an account on share builder today. That was kinda exciting but dammit I want that rose gold purse and shoes at Target! Now accepting donations.....

Christmas Morning

Im floored by Ava's patients. We use to wake up in the middle of the night when I was a kid. Ava slept in, walked into our room and said "I can't wait to open my presents" That was around 8 am. She is usually awake with Ruby around 6. I was really surprised and enjoyed Ruby opening her own presents. Ava got bored of unwrapping after a while so Ruby opened up her last few gifts. Ava said her favorite gift is the doll that wets herself and Ruby's is the terry cloth gingerbread house with all the ginger people inside. Its really cute, she hooks her tongue and takes them out of the house and puts them back in, over and over again.

The drums.....

Ava wrote a letter to Santa, all she really wanted was a pink drum set. She rocks them everyday! Ruby got a set of her own and Daddy.....he really loves the drum set too!

Christmas Day

So Ava got this really cool digital camera. The photo with her and the adorable boy is taken on her camera. That is Andrew, she calls him her "brother". He's our cousins fiance's son. He's in love with Ava, it makes me a bit nervous but he's sweet. The mic Ava is on was given to her by my sister. We all love this mic, its awesome! It has an echo and applause button. We are all rock stars in this house! The turquoise necklace was a gift from Breyne! It's very gorgeous! It's from anthropologie, so it has that magic.

Good Bye Holidays

We had really great holidays. For a while, Christmas had lost its magic for me. I found it a bit too stressful and jolly. I have to say having a four year old and a baby to celebrate, its excellent!! We had so much fun! We had a holiday tea party with Ava's friends, we looked at Christmas lights at griffith park and of course we visited Santa.
We also celebrated a great birthday with my dad, he turned 64. We had a very quite fun christmas eve. It was just the immediate family and it was nice! Christmas day was fun with the Miller family and the cabin was priceless!
I did feel a sense of relief after we rang in the new year and I got my kiss. It was a wonderous holiday season in our house but I am glad to move on with new year.

DAMN YOU ANTHROPOLOGIE!!!!!!

im upset! i always want to scream and cry like a two year old after i look at their stuff! i want to scream and kick my feet face down on the floor! I want to burn the catalog and let out a loud ROAR after! damn them! first they made curtains like my table cloth and im gonna get those some how! they will pull my room together nicely. then they made a white owl face enamel pendant about the size of a clementine with gold wispy brows, mother fuckers! then they have all these gorgeous dresses with gigantic bows that sing to my heart and THEN they have all these chunky heals and wedges, red, yellow, deep pine, forties style and im a wreck over it because I can't have them! its like heroine! i made a resolution and my god damn drug dealer is giving me free drugs! damn it!
im still having a screaming tantrum inside! nothing can ease this self obsessed anthropolgie whore!
My credit cards and singing to me like flowers out of Alice in Wonderland............
kids are starving in this word, people are homeless and i am homicidal over anthropologie.....i really am aware. I have a passion and a screwed up priority or two....... ;)